Fast forward past high school, college and beyond your social circle… And you’ll run into a unfortunate problem a lot of men face today: Where do I meet women?
While nearly half the world’s population is made up of females (Roughly 3.52 billion), the reality of finding the right woman isn’t as easy as it sounds.
Why is that?
Well, here’s the answer and you’re probably not going to like it. I’m not giving to give you statics that say only a certain percent are single, attractive, in-shape, etc. I’m going to flat out tell you the truth without all the excuses.
Most of the guys who really struggle meeting women have one common problem: They don’t ever leave the house or office!
When they do, they go to places where the competition is too high. These are same types of places where women want to relax, not be hit on over and over again!
Or, they get so buried in their phones that they shut the rest of the world out.
If you want to meet women you must stop being so distracted. Make eye content, smile. Be present and in the moment. Let them know you’re interested. Open your fu-cking mouth!
There is more to life than just Tinder and online dating sites. It goes right back to the competition aspect I just mentioned above.
Want to avoid chasing women and reeking of desperation? Read below:
Regardless of the day or time, women are out and about, everywhere, attending a whole host of social events from religious functions to volunteer work, shopping trips, etc.
In comparison, the average single man sits right at home, all alone.
Before you hop into the list of places to try below, consider one piece of advice first: Go to places where there’s less competition. In other words, places where women aren’t expecting to be hit on or approached.
When it comes to bars and nightclub, the reality is most guys and girls do nothing, aside from staring at each other the entire night. The men who are successful play a great game, and unfortunately most men can’t even compete on their level.
Now, while there’s success in numbers, don’t fool yourself. Women notice when a men gets rejected, even if he’s half away across the room. Most guys keep trying over and over, and by the end of the night their heads hung down low and they reek of desperation. Will they see success after the twentieth time? Sure, they might. However, most guys don’t have a large enough emotional bank account to handle that much rejection, especially in one single night.
Why go through all of that, let alone deal with all the competition if you don’t have to?
In reality, you can be a woman’s best and only option.
Places outside of the box.
Think of gentlemen as the hunters and the prowlers. Naturally, women hide from them. Where do they find a safe refuge?
In places like the mall, book store, coffee shop, and so on.
Now, these places aren’t ground-breaking, although perhaps for you, a few might be.
In reality, most of these places are where guys refuse to go on weekend nights. To them, hanging out in these spots equates to one thing: A wasted weekend.
That couldn’t be further from the truth!
Let’s face it, you can be as judgmental as the guys who aren’t bold enough to go to them. Or you can give these places a try, and see how just how easy to meet women. It’s your choice. For your sake, I hope you venture out to them with an open mind and start thinking outside of the box.
Airports. Unless you’re traveling on your very own private jet, you’ll be stuck doing the same thing as everyone else: Waiting around. Your flight gets delayed, your layover is too long, or perhaps you arrived a little too early at the airport in advanced. All of which, create for boredom.
In reality, most people are looking for ways to pass the time; talking is a great way to do that. Let’s face it, just by being there you have something in common before you even begin to strike up a conversation. Of course, many are adventurers or simply looking to meet new people along their travels too.
Take for instance my trip to London, I met a woman from my hometown on my first flight out while waiting in the lounge. On the connecting flight I met two British girls who sat across from my aisle; both lived in London near my hotel. On my last flight back home, I met another woman from my hometown who was returning from a vacation in another state.
Even if you suck in the communication department, holding a conversation at an airport is perhaps one of the easiest things to do. People love to gab on and on about all their vacation experiences/stories. Their eager to recommend their best hometown restaurants, bars, attractions etc too.
Museums. Art museums, art galleries, history/science museums and exhibits, etc.
Another thing to consider: A lot of universities host student-based art/design shows throughout the month. If you’re looking to hang around a younger crowd, it’s a good place to be.
The post office. When I was pumping out orders for the store, I paid a visit to the post office on a daily basis. Half of the time there would be a woman my age waiting in line next to me. In reality, women ship things too.
Meet ups. There’s a meet up group for just about anything these days. From tech to dog walkers, hikers, knitting and more. You name it, and one probably exists.
Faith based. If you’re religious join a church group. My neighbors were heavily into that sort of thing years ago, and I was surprised to discover how many events they got invited to. However, I’m not just talking about Bible studies here, I’m talking about parties, local gatherings, rather fun volunteer events, etc.
Needless to say, their social circle just by being in the church group was massive. Remember, friends lead to more friends, and yes, more new women too.
Recreation sports leagues. Join them, even if you suck at sports and don’t plan on being an all-star athlete in your lifetime. From coed kickball to bars with volleyball matches.
Take a class. That doesn’t mean you have to go back to college! Try improv, cooking, photography, music lessons, dancing, yoga/fitness classes, etc. If you like beer or wine, take a course and learn/taste all the different types.
Animal adoption centers. Meet man’s best friend and potentially your next girlfriend. Let’s face it, shelter pups need the same kind of love and companionship you’re looking for. However, that doesn’t mean you must adopt a dog on the spot at a local shelter or animal rescue center. You can always go with the intent of simply interacting with pets who desperately need a human friend for a day. Most, if not all of these places will gladly welcome you with open arms.
As a plus, the act alone shows your gentle side to any female you come across. Now, while you might think most volunteers are older, retired cat-ladies, the statement is only partially true. In reality, there are a lot of younger women who volunteer, including college students. You’d be surprised.
Of course, there’s one more thing to keep in mind. The majority of these shelters and recuse places host fundraising events, dog walks, and small gatherings through the month. It’s effortless to get an invite. Remember, you’re expanding your social circle greatly here; you’ll be introduced to more people than you can imagine.
Volunteer. Whenever someone brings up the word, “Volunteer” most tend to think at first glance things like soup kitchens, food pantries, helping the homeless and so on. Perhaps that’s not your thing, don’t worry. The truth is, there are a lot of different organizations that value your time. And yes, you’ll meet plenty of women through them.
Take for instance, the American Red Cross, Political Campaigns, Art Museums, Local Libraries, National Parks, Habitat for Humanity, Animal Societies, Youth Services, Environmentalist groups, Hackerspaces, Churches, Foundations, National Rifle Association, Sierra Club, etc. (I could go on forever here.)
Of course, there are other ways to volunteer that are outside the box. Consider teaching a self-defense class to women and girls. Offer to give a presentation/speech at a female-focused educational group. Aka, teaching tech skills at GirlCodeIt, or even photography, cooking, graphic design classes at local female meet ups.
The park. Walk the dog (go to a dog park). Let your kid roam around the playground. If you have neither of those two, go for a jog. Pull the bicycle out the garage and go for a ride. Kick a soccer ball around the field; shoot some hoops.
If you think parks are just for parents, kids and teens you’re mistaken. Sure, they are not packed with women like a bar or music festival, however, that’s the point. Don’t condition yourself into believing if there are not a droves of women somewhere you won’t meet one, because you will!
Eat out for lunch. No one likes to eat alone, but let’s face it, you do it in the privacy of your own home anyways. Don’t worry about it. During workdays skip the break room, leave the office, and go order lunch at a casual restaurant; sit at the bar counter.
When I worked downtown, I made it a habit to eat at all the local hipster places for lunch. Sure, it wasn’t always cheap however, I noticed an upside to it (aside from the often great food). A lot of women were doing the exact same thing as I was. They’d sit down next to me and we’d strike up a conversation. Yes, women eat alone too! Although, these weren’t always just women that worked nearby. The truth is, a fair number were from out of town, and quite lonely while looking for companionship in the city.
Of course, consider what happens when you place a to-go order… Where do you sit and wait? The bar. When a woman’s picking up a carry out order, more than often she’ll be sitting there for five to seven minutes, give or take, with absolutely nothing to do. It’s the perfect opportunity to talk to her.
Remember, over the period of a lunch rush hour, ten, twenty or more women could sit next to you; either to dine in or pick up a carry out order. (It’s almost like speed dating in a sense.) But I’m not finished just yet…The more you eat out in the city, the more female hosts and bartenders you meet along the way too.
Vintage/antique shops. Most women are interior designers by heart. You’ll be hard pressed not to find a girl shopping in an antique or vintage store; they are often packed with them. Best of all, there are so many objects of curiosity, aka props to start a conversation over.
If you’re wondering why a man would want to go to these types of places (aside from meeting women), I’ll tell you. You can find some of the best bachelor pad decor and furniture in the world. Most of the time, you’ll actually be able to afford it.
Keep in mind, you can also go to the mall.
Coffee shops. Don’t limit yourself to just Starbucks or Panera. Go to quaint coffee shops where things are more quiet and women can be found chatting amongst their friends.
Clubs. I already know what you’re thinking, I hate nightclubs. Not that kind. I’m talking about places like wine bars, music venues, jazz clubs and so on. Look for places where it’s not impossible to talk and the music isn’t overly loud.
Grocery Stores. Whole Foods and Target often have the best selection. Even better, pay a tip to a popular farmer’s market. Most women work long hours during the week, and put off grocery shopping until the weekend.
Libraries and Bookstores. Sure, they’ve fizzled out with the internet era however, that doesn’t mean they aren’t great places for any man to be. The truth is, plenty of women both old and young, go there on weekends to checking out and reading new books.
Movie theaters. Just like waiting in line at the grocery store, a woman may be standing next you. Ask her what see’s seeing. If you want to take it a step further, go see a chick flick. The moment you walk out of the theatre the halls will be packed with women; most of which will be eager to talk about the movie.
Weddings and small parties. If you’re invited, go.
Women Empowerment/Dating Seminars. This requires a little pre-planning, because it’s not what you think at first glance. Find out when the next (how to meet women or similar) seminar is. Sit down in the hotel lobby (wherever it’s being hosted at) just before the event ends.
The seminar leader will be pumping all these women with buried souls up. When the women start leaving, stop and ask one, “what’s all the buzz about?”. She will be opening up like a flower! Fast forward, and all her friends will be clapping and cheering her on when she tells them she met you. She’s a success of the program!
Laundry mat. Sure, most people have their own washer and dryer these days, however, there’s still a good percentage of both college students and adults who don’t.
Carnivals, fairs and festivals. You don’t have to be a kid to go to them. Take for instance a medieval festival, which is fun for just about any guy old and young. Remember, there’s all sorts of different themes; not just the classic festival most of us tend to think of.
Poetry and fiction readings.
Fund raising events. Marathons, races for cures, etc.
Get a part time job. Work at a restaurant if you need to expand your social circle and improve your communication skills at the same time. If you’ve ever worked a restaurant before, you’ll know why it’s one of the easiest places in the world to meet women. Most of the girls are looking for things to do after they clock out. Though, the job itself will almost always be grueling and suck.
Neighborhood events. If you’re in an apartment community swing by the resident appreciation events. You’ll get to meet your neighbors which again, expands your social circle. Some places even have get together where the community goes out to restaurants on different weekend and weekday nights.
Of course, you can always do what my neighbor did. He liked playing tennis so he formed a community club around it. A handful of other residents joined him, and among that group is a lot of women. Remember though, he didn’t just find others to enjoy a game on the court with, he also grew his social circle larger at the same time.
Fashion shows and conventions. Look, I get it. Most guys don’t understand fashion shows, much less care for them. However, they doesn’t mean you should avoid them all together. The reality is, the best part is what happens after the show. Everyone mingles and talks among each other; you will meet plenty of women. Period.
It’s no different than going to an industry convention. People go there to network. Sure, they learn a few new tricks and things but at the heart of it all is building up business connections. Even in the automotive industry, which generally lacks a female presence, I still know a guy who met his wife at one. When these events are hosted in Vegas, for instance, it’s a great way to mix business and pleasure without shooting yourself in the foot.
Right in front of you. Put down your damn phone! While you’re texting your friend about how hard it is to find a woman, the girl of your dreams is literally right in front of you. Only you’re too busy to notice her, because your eyes are glued to the screen. In reality, this scenario probably plays out hundreds of times per day amongst both men and women.
Even if you’re just checking your email, surfing the web, whatever, the same deal above applies. When you’re waiting in line and you whip your phone out, you’re essentially telling the rest of the world, “you’ve been shut out.”
One of the best things you can do is to leave your phone in the car when you go out in public. Do this for a month and I guarantee you’ll start noticing how women you missed the chance to talk to, because you were so busy link-fu-king, tweet-fu-king, etc.
Let’s face it…
It doesn’t matter if you live in a small town or big city. Excuses will never solve your problems. One way or another, if you want to meet women, it involves going outside, and often, going outside your comfort zone.
Some of these places might seem un-manly, a little foolish perhaps, but you know what, they work!
It’s funny. A lot of guys who say, “that’s lame”, etc. When they are the same ones who don’t get laid. Imagine that!
Remember, these places are all part of living an interesting life; something that women gravitate towards. Start thinking outside of the box and you’ll be surprised by how many girls you meet.
However, keep in mind one thing. Don’t be a desperate fool that goes out with the sole purpose of meeting women. Go out because you find a festival interesting, a beer-tasting event entertaining, or a walk at the dog park relaxing. Pay your emotional bank account first.
With that said, it’s truly not a difficult task gentlemen. Use the law of numbers to your advantage. There’s no denying that the more places you go, the more women you will meet. Consider how your social circle expands at the same time, and you will be astonished by all the opportunities presented in front of you.